The Grovenhold Adventures

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The Grovenhold Adventures

Please do not delete, this is a serious Kingdoms RP.

I am a self aware human being, not one of those Go-Bots trying to sell you watches. IM A REAL PERSON!

This isn't spam or off-topic. This is how I express myself in a Kingdoms related RP.


Person who obsessively hoards hundreds of thousands of cleaning products, napkins, towels, dusters, garbage cans, vacuums and well made shelves and cabinets all thrown about the house willy nilly.


I want to eat cotton balls out of a burlap sack


Open a nightcare center for nocturnal maniac babies


He was the gunt of the world
A towering meat beast
He could palm the largest watermelon


Skim flimping flimping, breaking off the wedged tiled chocolate flour with a smooth heeth, the chocolate is collecting in the scoop and coming back over forming the spiral that becomes the chocolate egg that gives birth to the background, breathing and blossoming yet nevertheless still chocolate.

This sentient chocolate being follows the butterfly pattern repeated infinitely as the curtains are drawn.


He was always there clad In leather. Wearing those shades and staring straight ahead but we could never see at what.

He'd always sit on a lawn chair in front of his garage seemingly starting straight ahead into the neighbours yard but it was hard to tell from behind those sunglasses.

One day they had had enough, they ran from across the street screaming, "HEY!!! HEY!!! What are you looking at!?" they charged towards the leather man and started waving their hands in his face.

The leather clad watcher didn't respond. He just stared straight ahead.

The neighbour pulled out a knife and started stabbing the LCW in the gut.

The LCW didn't flinch, just stared straight ahead. No blood seemed to be coming from him.

Finally the neighbour grabbed the LCW by shirt and yanked him to the floor and began kicking him in the ribs.

The LCW slide around on the floor a bit as he was being kicked, but he never so much as winced, his glasses never even came off.

The neighbour exhausted himself and eventually gave up and ran back across the street.

When he got across and looked back he saw the LCW casually get up off the floor and sit back down in the lawn chair in the same position he was previously in, staring straight ahead.


I remember the pretzel man at the fair. He had these frozen pretzels in a tub.

What he'd do was yank one out, dip it in this lil vat of water and then bring it up to his mouth and cough up a brisk spray of salt that would adhere to the wet pretzel.

Then he'd just pop it in the microwave for 60 seconds and viola!, there's your pretzel.


Guy 1: How much for that bag of cat litter?

Guy 2: I'm looking for 8 bucks.

Guy 1: Would you take 5?

G2: Ya, killing me here! The bag is full! Gimmie 7.

G1: I'll give you 6.50

G2: You're bustin my balls, but fine. Here.

*Guy 1 pays and walks off happily

G2 speaking to G3: I just sold that schmuck a bag of cat litter. I was just gonna throw it out.....


Everyone has that one friend who when you pass them the bottle it ends up being more full when they pass it back.

Its like dude, i know youre just casually throwing up back into the bottle and trying to play It cool.

Stop trying to play it off.


Coolguy shopkeeper gets heldup at gunpoint. He sorta smirks and rolls his eyes and just grabs the gun out of the robbers hands and throws it behind himself, "So, are you gonna buy something or are you gonna waste my time with this tough guy BS?" says the shopkeeper, not even calling the police.


Person using laptop directly in front of fire place. Laptop and its keys are melting and persons hair is starting to singe but theyre undaunted


Human intestines behind emergency glass where fire hose should be